Trump V Clinton: The Shinest of Two Turds

Yes, I’m finally talking about the US election, a subject I have never given any thought about, until this blog post. For many reasons, as I mainly wanted this to be a more light-hearted page, and I honestly never really had much new shit to bring to a dinner table so crowed not even the after dinner mind can find big enough gap. But the result of the votes is in early November, and I’m writing this in late October, so until more jokes about Trump’s actions as president are mad, I only have this small amount of time to hope on the mess of a band wagon. Now, before I begin I must state that I do not support either candidate, the title makes it clear enough, I’m just here to strike the iron of the campaigns while they’re still above room temperature. So let us begin, by beating a dead horse.

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Ah Donald Trump, what can be said about the man who hasn’t been said by every other news commentator, political figure, celebrity and every loud mouth millennial online. At this point his been given every insult imaginable: an idiot, racist, despite gaining votes from celebrities such as Denis Rodman and Azelia Banks, sexist, and there’s even the “Trump is literally Hitler” meme. Yeah great use of literally by the way. And given how the man has switched positions more times than a quick fire porn shoot, insulted and bashed women such as Rosie O’Donnell for her weight, with the attitude of a college frat boy; some of these claims are at least rooted in reality. So for those who already calling the man’s potential ascend to The White House the end times, his leaked ” grab her the pussy” tape was their “I told you so” moment. As were the allegations of multiple female contestants, who coincidentally have gone public in support for Hilary Clinton by the way, from The Appearance saying they were sexual harassed by Trump.

Which was kinda refreshing, as a lot of news coverage around the man was centred around his infamous border wall, since he made his policy’s clear to the public. I’m not kidding, ask any old bum of the street to list a policy of Donald’s, the first answer will definitely be about the Mexicans. Which given his lack of information about the out of building materials and time to do so, that aren’t vague estimates that won’t cost several arms and a leg for the average tax payer; and yet some how expects Mexico to split the bill. Suddenly everything make sense. Except for why people would support the man after that point, when members of the Republican Party (his party) have been sceptical for the man. He’s lucky that his cuts on taxes, and increases of payments from richer tax payers are keeping the supporters. However, whatever your thoughts on his policies are, it’s the man’s presence that’s attaching the voters and keeping them there.
I’m mean the man is bold and confident speaker, whose pretty much a middle finger to political correctness; which would be welcome in the age of SJW cry bullies. But that’s it; his giving his supporters what they want to hear, with enough stage presence to keep the attention of the media. It’s not secret a lot of the right-wing supports of America consider issues such as immigration and many other issues as what’s wrong with the country. And a man who tells those people who he’ll do what they want would seem appealing. Screenshot (146).pngParticularly when said person is a rich businessman with a net worth larger than Boris Johnson’s belt length, that is financing his own campaign, so no issues with him selling out to corporate interest; all the while bluntly bashing the competition, in his usual proud of himself big shot persona. Using plain, emotive language to appeal to with the frustrated supporters.  Like a politician, his telling his supporters what they want to hear. I could say more, but I’m running low on time, so here’s an interesting post on the subject if you’re interested.

As happy as I would be to have world leader brave enough to tell the politically correct morons of the world to go suck a fat one; specially when Clinton is known for decreasing the wage gap, and giving her support to Black Lives Matter. A move for equality so backwards, it’s one step away from letting Chris Brown and Bill Cosby run a women’s abuse shelter. The point still stands that Trump is way over his head, and is driven solely on his ego, in order to win the election. Now his unprofessional nature is bad enough, especially with the more recent things said about him. And yet there are still people who disagree with the guy, but are planning to vote for him, solely out of spite due to the competition. And given said other candidate, you can’t blame them.

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If Trump is seen as the American version of Jay from The Inbertweeners…I mean the adult, American version of Jay from The Inbertweeners; then let me present the female Frank Underwood. Even if she acts like more of a professional than Trump, that won’t stop her policy’s being one of the numerous reasons people are against her. Putting aside the shady private shit the deleted emails, there’s the no fly zone she’s planning to set up, while her campaign is funded by defence industries; coincidence? So yes, she plans to make Syria a no fly zone, which would at an estimate take around a thousand US troops, setting of conflicts with both Syria and Russia, the latter being a country with way more man power and nuclear weapons than the US, without adding to the country’s trillion-dollar debt as it would start a war in the process. And people say Trumps border wall is going to be a waste of cash. But given how she voted for the war in Iraq…and then said she didn’t, not surprising in hindsight.

What’s worse is that she plans to do this despite every political figure attached to the debate from Obama, to Bernie Saunders and Trump himself saying that this was a bad idea. To the never Trump people, you now have something to think about. And we get the two true reasons she’s disliked by many voters: she flips positions, and is a crook. I’ve already mentioned her two positions on Iraq, and the no fly zone that, by her admission, would lead to many deaths. But there are other agendas she’s changed for her means. Such as: abortion, and gay marriage. With any criticism being deflected by saying “due to new information, I now know this”. Say what you want about Trump, but at least his policy’s stayed somewhat consistent. This coming from a woman who said every politician needs a public image, as well as a private one, in a meeting with Goldman Sachs.

And now we get into the Wiki Leaks shit. Not just the deleted emails she accidentally deleted, after accidentally sending classified information on an unregistered account…thirty thousand times. There’s the child rapist she helped in court, clearing his charges despite knowing he was guilty. And how she blackmailed and bullied the women her husband had sex with during his time at The White House. Nice one miss feminist president. Her corporate interest falls somewhere between The Sheriff of Nottingham and Mr Krabs from Spongebob Square Pants. Till the point that Wiki Leaks have exposed her campaign of rigging her way to winning the Democrat Nomination. If you’re confused about how Bernie Saunders, the Democrat with the larger supporter numbers than Clinton, got turned down due to lack of votes from Democrat supporters. Well that was most due to the reduced number of polling stations in states that over overwhelmingly supported Bernie Saunders.

Yeah. Hillary Clinton, got away with rigging the system in her favour, while the main stream media aids her in her goal to able the people calling her out as conspiracy theorist. And of course she did this to Trump. She was the woman who labelled his supporters as hateful and violet after all. With the cases of Trump enforced violent outburst, has now been revealed to be caused by members of the democrats. Because she’s taking the Creationist approach to research; if you can’t find any proof of your claims, make your own.  Am i watching real life politics or an episode of House Cards?

So these are the candidates America has to choose from. A blow hard egotist that knows what his audience wants; or a candidate so unpopular she has bend reality to suit her needs, and hope the main stream media is too high on the anit-Trump wagon to even notice. Good luck America you’re going to need it.

Thank you for your time.

 

Review: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)

Image resultOut of a combination of interest and “why the hell not?” I decided to watch the 2014 version on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. And yes to my regular readers….both of you. I know this isn’t a newly released film, and the sequel is already out on DVD, “so why are you reviewing it then?” Firstly, don’t tell me how to run my blog, and the second reason is that if I can think of something worth typing, I’d do it; and boy is this worth talking about I assure you. Now for starters, I’m only a causal fan of the Ninja Turtles. I’ve watched and enjoyed the 2003 cartoon, I adore the 2012 series, and I’ve seen and liked the films, well the first two live action films I like, and the 2007 animated film is still pretty damn good. The third live action film; OH MY GOD, KILL AND BURN IT! And this film can go join the bomb fire.

So where to start, the plot? Ha! For a Ninja Turtles film, this film’s script is on creative auto pilot. It’s basically the four Turtles fighting the Foot Clan as they stop Shredder’s big plan, with some dashes of the Turtles established backstory, and the third act of The Amazing Spider-man. Image result for teenage mutant ninja turtles 2014 aprilOh and April O’Neil is in it. OK to the film’s credit we do learn said back story through her, and we do learn about William Fichtner’s character, or as I like to call him: not Shredder given the back lash to the film’s original casting. So April isn’t the most unless character in the film; that title goes to Will Arentt’s character. That said she is as forced into the script’s situation, the same way a brick is forced into a light socket. The actual plot itself has less depth than a pen cap, and it’s structurally linear as the pen itself. The back story almost gets the source material right, but in order to have Splinter and the Turtles know martial arts, the writers end up reaching so far; their arms must be the length of their entire body.

Moving onto the performances And what’s not helping Megan Fox is that her performance has the range of a shot from an asthmatic pea shooter. Image result for teenage mutant ninja turtles 2014 shredderAs for Shredder, his just a big brute for shake of having the chrome tar beaten out him by the end of the film. With the CGI Silver Samuri suit having more personality than the actor himself. Which again, isn’t helped by Fitchner’s recast; with him being the only villain with some sort of personality, even if his motivation comes down to: we wouldn’t have a movie if he didn’t. The only some what interesting characters in this, are the Turtles themselves. And even then Raphael is the only one with a character growth, Michelangelo is just there for comedic relief, which is neither comedic nor a relief or any kind; especially when he can’t seem to keep it in his pants, when around April. I’m serious; his behaviour is so odd, you’d feel guilty for leaving him alone with a vacuum cleaner, let alone a human woman. As for Leo,  he’s just the leader to get every one of their asses, while Donatello is just the exposition guy. But I will say that the voice actors were well picked, and do work decently with each other. Even if it’s just standard by comparison against the other media with their green faces on it.

Speaking of the Turtles’ green faces, the CGI is good, when it comes to the movements. While some cases they do look decent, other times they fail to blend with the live action sets; and the faces some how look worst than the puppet heads that used in the live action films. And given little of a crap the studio gave at film three, that’s saying a lot. Speaking of the looks, yet again it’s the action is the only saving grace that Micheal Bay decided to create for this franchise, wait he wasn’t the director? Well the action is the only saving grace that Micheal Bay let someone else decided to create for this franchise. With the chase down the snowy mountains being the highlight, as it was fast paced, and the only interesting set piece that isn’t just: just people fighting in the dark. The combat itself is basically any martial arts film, but not as fun or inventive. The ending fight is done well, but it’s mostly just ripping of The Amazing Spider-man, to the point were it’s the heroes vs the big bad guy, on the top of skyscraper, trying to prevent a toxic fart cloud from being unleashed onto the nearby city, and infecting/ killing the people below.

And now for the lighting round of complaints. The costume designs are basic. The pacing is sperattic with some scenes being the duration of a melting candle, to then switch into quick dashes, like The Flash on buretto Thursday. No seriously, there is a point where characters make it back to the sewers of New York, from some snowy mountains, with the span of a couple of hours. And while we’re bashing the plot. It’s revealed that Splinter learned his skills in martial arts, from a Japanese book about martial arts. Let me repeat that. A mutated rat, that has gained Intelligence and human speech, despite living in the sewers throughout the later half of his life. Becomes a master in ninjitsu, by reading a Japanese bloom about the subject. I’ll gladly give all of the money in my bank account to the animal scientist who can explain, how the hell that works?!

In closing the film kind of unfocused and kinda dull. Mainly due to flat characters, dialogue so forced you see the scene crack around it. Overall while the action is fun in an over the top way, and the four leads do well; this isn’t really worth the attention if I’m too honest.

And as for the sequal…i’ll get back to you on that.

Thank you for your time.