Have you ever seen something that doesn’t make sense to you, something that seems really questionable, and yet everyone else is excepting it? Well this is the subject of this blog; or rather future blogs. As I’ve decided to open up a new segment on this blog called Think It Through, or T.I.T for short. Stop laughing! Through this segment, i shall be looking over things in the world that flat out make no sense and poke holes in their logic, all in a comedic (i hope) way. So let’s begin.
So i’m sure at some point in your life you’ve had difficulties spelling words. Very common mistake, right? Sure you have, I’ve certainly had my moments. And the one thing i find the most pointless thing i find about spelling, is silent letters. Seriously they’re like the flower vases someone pleases around the house to make the room look nicer. If a letter is gong to be featured, why would you not prononce…. oh sorry “pronounce” it? Trust me there’s more examples to come. In any case the whole process of not saying a featured word, it’s like buying a game for a video game console you don’t own, nor intend to buy.
A good example is Wednesday. If you look at the word, it looks like it should be said as Wed-nes-day. But no as we all know, it’s pronounced as Wens-day; do you see how pointless the D and second E are? Another example is plumber; you would think with the included B, you’d say it as “Plum-ber”. But no, the B is silent, meaning it pronounced plumber. Because for some reason the person who created them words; or the person who created the concept of silent letters, thinks that it makes their words look all fancy and stuff. Oh how can we not forget about the K when it’s silent; because K is a repeat offender in all this. Take the word knight for example, when the royalty member that created the role an knight to protect the kingdom, did they not realize that an extra letter to the name doesn’t show the higher class over the people they ruled over; the armor and clothes did that job.
It’s the same issue with knee. When the doctor that mapped out and researched all of the medical research on the knee area of the leg, did that person write knee as we do today or did he or someone else convince them do do it in an attempt to impress their piers in the medical world? You discovered how the human leg works, surely that should’ve given you enough praise for your research. Am i the only one who noticed that K is automatically silent when next to the letter N? Think about it: knight, kneel, knee and knowledge. All of them start with a silent K and are then followed by N. Apparently N is the playground bully, while K is the wimpy kid who keeps quite in order to not be tossed in to the nearest dumpster.
And while were on the subject, how many times does P get picked on by many different letters? Look at this: Pneumonia, Pterodactyl, and Psychology. Unlike K where there’s a clear pattern. P’s use of being silent is just random, especially when being next to letters like N, T and S. All three of those words start with different sounds, and a silent P. How bad is P social skills? Or maybe P has a crush on all three of those letters and is just to shy to admit it. I never knew letters could identify with the Mormon church.
And then you have cases of letters replacing other letters, despite the sound of the word’s starting point. Urge is an example of this. Given the “er” sound in the beginning, i thought it was spelled “erge”; sounds reasonable right? But as you saw earlier, it is spelled with a silent U at the beginning; because reasons. Going back to P again, i already explained it’s often used as a silent letter. But that doesn’t explain why putting it and the letter H together, makes an “fuh” sound. Ph=F. No sense has been made here. It appears that when the two letters come together, they fade away into nothing and become silent; and yet during this process, they then merge together and start to do a Megazord style transformation that results in them becoming the letter F…some how. Case and point: Phil, photograph and phrase. All three could be be replaced with the letter F at the start, i mean they already sound they do start with F. Why are these two letters pretending to be something they’re not?
In conclusion, silent letters are the bow ties of the English alphabet: in the sense that it’s used in the attempt to make a word look smarter than it is. Secondly, we need to improve whatever issues the letter K and N have going on between each other. Thirdly if P and H were people, they would be in jail for multiple accounts of identity theft. And finally, silent letters are something the creator of the concept should’ve looked back on; and decided to think it through. As i child gramma…sorry “grammar” and the English subject was difficult enough, and all of this wasn’t helping. In the words of Homer Simpson. “You can’t change the rules in the middle of the game!” Again people, think it through.
Thank you for your time.